In my opinion Murphy (whoever he was) was one of the wisest of men. His law regarding everything that can go wrong going wrong cannot be truer. I see it everyday in my life, the lives of those around me and the lives of everybody else. Here are some of my takes :

  • The cable goes at precisely the climax of a great movie which you, surprisingly, haven't seen earlier. It shall return not a moment before the start of the ending credits.
    • Corollary: The cable works fine when you are watching some really shitty movie and conks out only AFTER the credits start rolling.
  • The phone is usually on low battery whenever a charger or power outlet is unavailable.
  • The most anticipated movies are somehow released the weekend before some crucial work/academic deadline.
    • Corollary: On those rare weekends you do happen to be free there will be no good movies to watch or tickets shall be unavailable.
  • Your pet shall wake you from your slumber only when you are dreaming of the girl you've had a crush on for the longest of times (and unlike real life, in the dream you were about to get her too)
  • The rare important messages that you get on the phone will only come when you are eating, driving, attending a call of nature, in an important meeting, sleeping or otherwise engaged.
    • Corollary: The messages that you receive when you are relatively free are always spam or some useless forward.
  • Your computer hard drive shall fail the day before you planned to back up all your important data.
    • Corollary: Computer hard drives tend not to fail as long as they don't contain any important data.
  • Your software will have a critical update available for it only a week after it has already crashed.
  • The RJ never announces the name of a really nice song at its end if you happen to catch it on the radio whilst flipping through stations.
  • The power company always cuts the power when you walk back home from work at night and its a moonless night. The power will return only after you reach home.
  • The apparel/car/electronics company shall give heavy discounts only after you have already emptied your wallet buying their most desirable product.
  • The stock market only goes down when you invest in it. (This isn't that true these days thanks to the economic boom and all)
  • Your gadget will conk off only after the warranty expires.
  • Your friends are always in town either when you aren't or you just don't have the time.
    • Corollary: When you come to town your friends choose precisely that time to make that long delayed trip somewhere out of town.
  • The day you plan to get drunk is a dry day or the liquor store doesn't have the liquor of your choice or you can't find a drinking buddy.
  • Auto-drivers, rickshaw walas, taxi drivers are always around to pester you when you already have your own car.
    • Corollary: Those unfortunate days when you don't have personal transport are the days when the aforementioned pests are nowhere in visual range.
  • The day you finally have the time to read the newspaper at leisure is the day that the journalists have nothing to report about.
  • The girl your really like is always dating the guy you really hate.
    • Corollary: The girl who really likes you is usually the one you hate the most.
  • The only people who do better than you in life are the ones who you hate the most or would like to make jealous the most.
  • The only people who read this blog are the ones who don't appreciate it!!

A lot of people may not realise this but it has been 6 years since that Spanish speed demon, Alonso that is, planted his rear end into the seat of an F1 car for the first time. Like a lot of racers he started at the bottom, racing for the forever-minnows, Minardi. Then in 2002 he got a seat test-driving for Renault. In 2003 he was bumped up to racing driver and the rest as they say is history. However, for the Tifosi in me, he shall always be the man who ruined Michael Schumacher's retirement. He will always be the man whose picture I throw darts at. The man whose defeat in 2007 I celebrated more than I did Raikkonen's victory.

F1 in 2007 had more drama than any of the daytime soaps that entertain billions of women on the planet. What with jealous team mates, harassed team bosses and betrayal by former team employees. Not to mention the quiet chap who walks .. I mean drives .. away as the hero in an unexpected climax. Phew!! Beat that Ekta Kapoor.. I dare ya!

The bickering and squabbling over at the McLaren camp has again highlighted the biggest problem with McLaren. An F1 paddock may be big enough to fit two world class drivers and their cars but it will never accommodate their egos. A fact proven by McLaren when they hired Alain Prost and Ayrton Senna in 1988 and again when they got Raikkonen and Montoya together in 2005. As Michael Schumacher very correctly stated, there is only one number one driver. With this power struggle there is always one clear loser. Montoya left F1 to join NASCAR (I guess he didn't like taking corners too much). And now Alonso has left McLaren for an uncertain future.

2007 also exposed an ugly side of the Spaniard. The world saw him for the prick who he really is. A grown man who cried like a baby because he couldn't bear to have the spotlight taken away from him and put onto a mere rookie who was in his first year as a F1 racer. How dare you Lewis??? And give Fernando his candy back too!! And now it seems no one wants this spoilt child. After all would you? No one will except perhaps a Mr. Flavio Briatore. The man who made Schumacher. The person who gave Alonso his first break. The one running things over at Renault. So may be the sun hasn't quite set on old Alonso. Muy buena!!

However its been more than a year since Renault showed some spunk. They spent 2007 sputtering. Fighting it out more often with the Torro Rossos than the rosso red Ferraris. However, a year is millenium in F1. There is nothing to stop Renault from making a car as superior as the one they had last year. But somehow I feel they wouldn't be able to pull it off. My gut still tells me that Renault will be battling it out in the middle of the pack rather than waging a war at the front with the Ferraris and McLarens.

Of course it is definitely plausible that he may join some team other than Renault but which? Ferrari? Of course not.. they have a good thing going on. He may do better by joining the likes of Williams or BMW but are they good enough to get him the third championship he so badly desires. I doubt it. From where Alonso is he has only one way to go... down. Once you are down that road in F1 its hard finding a way back up.

I don't quite know how I found this page. One moment I was reading the review for "Superbad" and a few clicks later I'm reading about the sensitivity (or rather the lack of it) of the Delhi Police to the safety of young women from the North-East in our nation's capital. My habit of following links on the internet as led me to many interesting web pages. Just thought this one was exceptional enough to be blogged about.

Following is a poster by filmmaker K.P. Sasi, titled Rules for girls, circulated on an email discussion, gives a telling yet humorous take on the subject of being a woman in a world of sexual predators.

Don't go out alone at night
That encourages men

Don't go out alone at any time
Any situation encourages some men

Don't stay at home
Intruders and relatives can both rape

Don't go without clothes
That encourages men

Don't go with clothes
Any clothes encourage some men

Avoid childhood
Some rapists are turned on by little girls

Avoid old age
Some rapists prefer aged women

Don't have a father, grandfather, uncle or brother
These are the relatives that often rape young women

Don't have neighbours
They often rape

Don't marry
Rape is legal within marriage

To be quite sure - DON'T EXIST!

To read the full article Click Here.

Everyone who owns a TV in this country and has heard the term F1 must have heard it, seen it or read about it. A certain bearded liquor tycoon has purchased a Formula 1 team and renamed it Force India. Yes, F1 fans all over the country are corking open bottles of bubbly (beer that is) and celebrating over the fact the one sixth of humanity has a home team to cheer for in the world's second most watched sport. But before some of us get all wasted cheering for team India in F1 and some others wasted for cheering with all those cheering for team India lets think about it for a second.

Those boys at Spyker who have found a new boss in Mr.Mallya aren't really what you call a championship winning team. They have never been consistent on the track nor off it. They were called Midland F1 in 2006 and Jordan before that. Hell, they haven't even been consistent in being owned!! The last time I heard of them win some points was at the US Grand Prix in 2005 where all the Michelin runners refused to race due to safety issues. That left just Ferrari and Jordan out to pick up some points. It wasn't really a race. More of an obligation to the organizers, spectators and television broadcasters.

Now what Mr. Beer Seller has done is plaster the name of a country of 1.1 billion on to two cars which would more often that not finish first at the wrong end. I can imagine the headlines now.
Force India finish last.. again. Force India..not a force to reckon with. Force India.... forced off the track. No other team has a country in its name. And with good reason. Formula 1 isn't like other sports. Italian teams managed by a Frenchmen hire German drivers to drive British designed cars to win races in America, Brazil, Japan and China among others to win the world championship (If you haven't guessed it yet I was talking about Ferrari and Michael Schumacher). Its truly a global sport where a team doesn't identify itself with a country. The only thing that matters is winning not winning for someone.

When you put India on the team you identify India with it. You identify the hopes and aspirations of a country which is just beginning to get the F1 bug with a team that is more used to failure than success. Imagine the millions who glue to the TV screen for the first time ever to cheer India and be greeted with failure. Lets face it. Force India will not be a force to reckon with in 2008. Nor in 2009. Corporate giants like Toyota who have spent five years in Formula 1 have yet to find their footing. Its highly unlikely that Force India will be a force to reckon with for quite a few years. Till then the shame of watching their "national"team lose all the time would have turned many not-die-hard-fans-of-the-sport away from F1. I never thought I would write this but I really do wish that Mr.Mallya had renamed his new acquisition team Force Pakistan! And as an icing on the cake he could hire a Pakistani dude named Musharraf to drive it too. Nothing unites Indians like watching Pakistan get kicked in the nuts!

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